My Little Brother... Howie

Howard Llewellyn VanNatter
There is nothing in life more important than family. I love my little brother so much. This year has been so hard having him away. I can't believe he has been gone for 8 months now. I know that nothing can be done of that... But please pray for him, and my family, especially my parents. I have learned so much about the atonement this year. With all I have gone thru so far in my short 28 years, nothing has taught me more about how much the Lord loves us, and how we need to turn to him. We just received Howard's sentencing. I know most of you have been in the dark as to what is going on with him, but he made some mistakes and is paying the consequences of those mistakes. Though we live in a impartial world and a wicked one we are trying to have hope that things will get better. I don't trust the system which governs us because evil men control it. I support our country but it is hard to have faith in it. I don't. I only have faith in God and the Priesthood, and their power to govern us righteously. Howard was given 5 years, and will be leaving to a juvenile detention center in Tucson soon until he turns 18, then will return to Florence. I pray that a miracle will happen and he will return to us sooner, but I also pray that I can have more faith and put my trust in the Lord. That is what I am learning right now, how to live in a wicked and evil world and yet not become a part of it. Everything the Savior did was set apart from the world. I am finally understanding this. Howard is trying so hard and is succeeding at separating himself from the enviroment around him. I can't believe the man he has become in just 8 months. I will always worry about him but as long as he continues what he has done so far he will be great. The boys call him "preacher" because he is always talking to them about church, the scriptures, and will not allow himself to follow in anything that they do. Everyone knows to leave him alone and not try to push him into things, and others stick up for him. I am so grateful for that. I have learned compassion for those I never really thought twice about. I have learned that the best men in the world can do unthinkable things if Satan is allowed to influence their minds. I have learned that God WILL forgive all men, and will make them better than before. I have learned that Humility is one of the greatest keys to our happinness. On the flipside I have learned that Pride truly is evil. And yet it is one of my biggest vices. Howard told me that pride is the biggest thing he has learned about. He told me that when he gets out he will not allow himself to get caught somewhere where pride doesn't allow him to seek help. Where pride makes you feel like doing good is corny, where pride allows you to do stupid things so that you feel cool. I am grateful for the things he has learned, and what I am learning from him. I know this is a lengthy post, and I hope you take it in the spirit that it is shared. My family is a precious pearl to me. But I will not allow my pride to keep me from sharing my testimony with those that I love... I pray that you are each turning to the Lord in these days. I KNOW that we are each going thru our own unique challenges, and I know that it is because we are in an era of great refinement. So again, I pray with all my heart that you feel my testimony, that God lives. That the Atonement of his Son Jesus Christ is a life saving gift that they gave us, to enable us to return to live with our families one day. That we live in a remarkable time and we cannot procrastinate our days, we must purify ourselves and bring our families closer together.