Dean Matthew Wilkins - His BIRTH story

Lying in bed doing the babies 20 minute heart stress test.

It's amazing how zoned I felt. I was doing my self-hypnosis and I could hear things around me, but only paid attention to what I wanted.

Can you see my cute nails?  :)  It was important to me this time to look as good as I could. I felt like I might get confidence from cute nails and toes :)  lol

Little did I know I would be having a baby here in a few minutes! Man it happened so fast!

Still didn't know Dean was only minutes away.

Janice asked me what position I wanted to be in for labor, I remember thinking why are we 

talking about this already? I am not that close....   lol   yea right!

looks like we are just standing around talking... I really was having LOTS of pressure :) I had Dean while kneeling on the bed and leaning against the back of it.

I have such amazing women in my life!

Light Bulb!   This is me realizing Dean is coming now!  :)  hahha  

Dean Matthew Wilkins' birth story

Dean Matthew Wilkins

Born - April 1st 2012  @  4:35pm

APRIL FOOLS DAY

Palm Sunday

General Conference Sunday

8lbs.  19 3/4"

2.5 hours of labor

Conference Sunday...  I woke up and tried to enjoy the first session of conference. For anyone who knows me I look forward to conference and never miss anything. But this session I couldn't sit still. I got up and cleaned the kitchen, and made breakfast. I watched a few talks but couldn't concentrate. I think I eventually took a small nap. The boys took a nap around 130pm and I got ready to sit down for the second session of conference. Around two I realized I was having some light contractions. I felt like I should lay down and get some rest. I asked Danny to put on Ironman :) I wanted a distraction, something funny that could keep me positive. I also called my mid-wife. Because Hyrum was a 4 hour labor she wanted to know right away when I was having contractions in order to ready for anything.  I got off the phone and layed down. After 20 minutes I asked Danny to turn the movie off, the contractions were getting much stronger and I could tell they were working contractions. Meaning, that they were doing something! I had Danny turn on the Self Hypnosis CD for relaxation. I went thru a couple of contractions lying on the couch. They were very strong but I handled them well thru relaxing and breathing. But They went quickly to about 3 minutes apart and I knew it was time. We called the Mid Wife and said we are on the way to the hospital now! I went to the bathroom and had a couple of contractions that really hurt! It's hard to relax your body when you are walking around.  I came out of the bathroom and said Danny, I think I want to do something new with this baby. Let's go ahead and get an epidural! :) He was all... I don't care Trisha, this is your body and I will support you no matter what. I was being silly and was more worried about disappointing my doula, and my boys.  (ps Danny had run to the neighbors to give them our baby monitor so that they could get the boys once they woke up from nap)  lol   that's how we roll...     I got in the car and then had to climb back out again because I was having contractions and couldn't sit down. I stood up and leaned against the van. I prayed to God that I could get to the hospital quickly and without too much pain. I prayed that he would bless me with the strength to do what I felt was best. I also prayed that we would NOT have the baby in the van!   :)  There was a wonderful breeze and I felt so much strength!  My neighbor Bethany came out as we drove by and waved. It was a small thing but it lifted my spirits even more. On the way Danny talked to me about our reasons for doing the birth that we had planned. It helped me remember why my birth plan was so important to me. It also helped me remember the blessing he had given me a week before. I had prayed for a miracle in a quick and somewhat painless birth :) The Lord promised me that I would have all the tools to make it a wonderful experience if I used them and trusted in him. By the time I got to the hospital I was ready to do a natural birth again. The hospital staff tried to check me in but luckily one smart nurse really looked at me and said let's get her upstairs she is ready to go! The wheelchair driver tried to take me to triage but luckily my mid wife Janice had a labor room prepared and the nurses intercepted him.

  Lying in bed doing the babies 20 minute heart stress test.

 I literally walked in the room and Janice was stripping me down and lying me in bed so that she could check my progression and for the babies 20 minute stress test! I remember thinking please be more than a 5! She checked me and said you are almost at an 8 and ready to go! I thought to myself, sweet only a few hours and Ill have a baby! Little did I know....      Remarkably lying in bed on my side wasn't as hard as it had been in previous labors. Danny immediately had my relaxation music on, and I went into my zone. I ignored all the nurses questions until they finally figured out that Danny could take care of it. They were great nurses! Very flexible. They even read my birth plan! wow! I can remember lying there totally zoned out, relaxing. Thru the contractions I would think "let go, give in to your body, open up, let go! trust in your body, BREATHE!" When I was not having contractions I was able to listen to the music and to those around me. At one point I looked up and my oldest sister Sariah walked in and I felt so much love for her, and felt a new strength.

It's amazing how zoned I felt. I was doing my self-hypnosis and I could hear things around me, but only paid attention to what I wanted.

Can you see my cute nails?  :)  It was important to me this time to look as good as I could. I felt like I might get confidence from cute nails and toes :)  lol

 Finally I was allowed out of the bed, which again proved to be hard because I was so relaxed! The second I got up and moved everything was harder! I went to the bathroom and while going my water broke!  Everyone was so worried about me having the baby on the toilet! I heard Janice say something about not doing that anymore, and Tracie really wanted me to get up and move to the bed. I just kept thinking, I know I am progressing quickly but I am fine ladies, he is not coming yet! I had NO clue he was minutes away from entering the world.

Little did I know I would be having a baby here in a few minutes! Man it happened so fast!

Still didn't know Dean was only minutes away.

Janice asked me what position I wanted to be in for labor, I remember thinking, why are we talking about this already? I am not that close....   lol   yea right!

looks like we are just standing around talking... I really was having LOTS of pressure :) I had Dean while kneeling on the bed and leaning against the back of it.

I have such amazing women in my life!

 I could not choose a position, this happened in less than a minute, but I felt so blah..... didn't know what to do, just felt pressure, extreme pressure! :) Finally Tracie told me to kneel on the bed and try it. I was not super excited about it, but who is at this point? This is still right after I had walked out of the bathroom and I grabbed the girls to lean on. At this point I bore down and literally felt Dean drop! It was a crazy feeling. The next one was a push and I knew it was time to get into some sort of position so I followed Tracie's advice.

Light Bulb!   This is me realizing Dean is coming now!  :)  hahaha  

 Up until this moment I was still thinking that everyone was saying things like any minute, and I was feeling like, what? I am sure I have hours ahead of me. It was a surreal feeling. Especially when I pushed for the first him kneeling on the bed. I then KNEW without a doubt that I really was going to have a baby in second. I couldn't believe it. This was an intense time, though it was still manageable. It felt so wonderful to be in control of my body. I was able to decide when to push, and for how long. Once I was mentally ready I bore down and out came my little "bullet" I was shocked by how fast it all went.

Dean Matthew Wilkins aka "the Bullet"

Good Job US!

I am grateful for a wonderful husband who allows me to be strong and fly, and yet is there to hold me up when I falter. He did so many little things throughout that short time to help me. His words of strength, getting things ready and out the door so quick, holding oils under my nose while my eyes were closed. He knew everything to do.

My favorite Mid-Wife in the world!

My sweet boy. The ladies said I kept repeating "I can't believe it's over" I was referring to A- the fact that Dean came so fast, and B- that I was not pregnant anymore, and the looooong 10 months was over!

 I was in such awe of my little man. He looked like a wise old man. Erin calls him a wise little owl. So he already has two nicknames though only hours old.  I was in love with him immediately. His little face was so squishy and chub! And I love his hair! There is a ton of it, and thick! He has natural high lights. The tips are real light, and the roots are brown. So strange!  I was in shock that I was in labor for only 2 and a half hours. I couldn't believe it was all over. The pregnancy pains, the anxiousness of wanting my baby, the worries over labor, etc... It was over and I was here with my precious baby. I kept thanking God in my heart for such a quick and manageable labor. I am so grateful to have wonderful women in my life that were great strengths. My mom was so sad to have missed a birth of one of her grandchildren but she was at my Uncle Harry's funeral in West Virginia. Besides, with how far she lives from the hospital there is no way she would have made it in time for his birth anyway.  I am grateful for the confidence I felt from Heavenly Father, and I am thankful that so many provided me with the tools needed to have a great birth.

Look at all that hair. It was love at first sight!

Danny was thinking about the Bill Cosby skit where he tells his wife, congrats you just had a lizard. Because the baby changed colors so many times from birth...  :)

 It's funny how unsure of himself Danny can pretend to be. Maybe he actually believes it. But it is in no way true. He is such a great dad even if he is not what he calls a "baby dad". He thinks he will be a great teenager dad. I think he just wants boys to order around and have do chores for him :) Danny is wonderful. He helps me so much at home. Nobody can wrap a baby as good as him! When I am not home he does prayer, scripture reading, and songs with the boys. He loves to cuddle with the boys in the lazy boy.  He might have things that he doesn't like to do with the babies, like diapers. But he does it all, and doesn't complain too loudly :)

Three boys! Good job daddy! One more and we can have an Olympic swim relay te

am.

Somebody get me to my momma!!!

8lbs.   19 3/4 "  Born at 4:35pm   April 1st 2012   Our little April Fools baby (palm sunday)

Whatcha talkin' bout Willis?!

r

Making his first mark in this life

Aunt Sariah and Dean. She was such a great help during delivery! She is a natural doula! She has the gift!

Aunt Jilly came right away to visit. She always takes the best pics. with my kids

Uncle Tyden. He is about to have a new baby boy soon... Are you ready for a new little baby?  :)

Aunt Erin, soon to be mommy to Two little boys!   Tyden and Erin brought Barrett to the hospital with them. He was so good. He drank almost a full cup of my dCranberry juice. He loved it!

Grandma Wilkins meets Dean for the first time

Grandpa DEAN Wilkins, and baby Dean.  Baby Dean has a lot of work to do in order to live up to Grandpa's name.

We love Grandpa Dean and were so happy to give our son his name. He is a great man and I am grateful to have married into his family. He taught my husband many skills, and attributes that made me want to marry him. I hope that my boys will strive to be like their daddy and Grandpa!

Hyrum and Clynn meet their new little brother for the first time. Hyrum was FULL of energy after not seeing momma for two days. He was very happy! Clynn was a little confused by all of Hyrum's energy :)  But he was happy to see mom and dad!

Clynn loves his new little brother. The boys are so soft with him!

We love our little family. We are so happy to have such wonderful boys, each with their very own personality! It is a fun challenge, and one that will only get better with time!

2011 Holiday update

Wilkins Christmas / New Years 2011-12

We had so much fun this holiday and were able to do many things with our large family.

Daddy and the boys. Hyrum 2 1/2yrs. and Clynn 1 1/2 yrs. old
Roping at Denver's house with the uncles and Grandpa.

I am so thankful for my sweet little family. This pregnancy like the others has been very hard on me. I can't eat without throwing up, I am tired, somewhat cranky, and constantly have cramps etc... This one has been especially hard as I have two cute boys that need me, and because I have been having bad pelvic pains since early on and sometimes have a hard time getting around. But the last week or so, I have had a surge of energy and I am grateful for that. Also, though I am 26 weeks pregnant I have not thrown up for 2 days, and that makes me happy :) We'll see how long it lasts, lol. We have so much fun together. Danny is a great daddy and really helps me out at home. I am so lucky to have such a strong, supportive husband. And my boys can lift me out of any bad mood with their abundance of energy, quick smiles, tummy laughs, and silly antics.

We spent time with just our family decorating for Christmas, making gingerbread houses, organizing the home for the new baby, and doing FHE activities which included starting a savings for the boys Mission funds :)

Clynn looks a little worried about the possibility of having to leave mommy one day, whereas Hyrum is daydreaming about all of the letters from girls he will sure to be getting.

We went to the Temple the day after Christmas. It might start becoming a traditional day to go. It was so nice to end the Christmas season at the temple, thinking of Christ, and being so near His holy home.  I love my Savior so much, and loved being here with all my boys!

My favorite picture spot on temple grounds. Right in front of the reflection pool. For me, it's like seeing the physical and spiritual side of the temple in one view. I love it! Especially at Christmas time with all the lights sparkling around it in the reflection. 

Hyrum created this special moment for us. He was running back and forth excited all night. Crowd dodging, saying excuse me, and laughing all night. But, when we got to this point, he saw the Star and ran as fast as he could to it, then stood there staring for at least 5 minutes. He loved the manger, and the star mostly. He wouldn't even talk to us or turn his head. So we all just sat there pondering our Savior. It was a special moment for us. Even Clynn sat there quietly.

I got me some handsome boys. What more can I say?

Danny has been so busy with work. Right now he is working with his brothers during the week, and then he is also working with his uncle, as his uncle Chester often hires out his brothers and him to help him do his jobs. We are grateful for all the work. Right now they have been especially busy, to the point that they are getting backed-up and are having to work very hard. At times Danny does not get home until around 7pm at  night, though he leaves around 4am every day.  He also stays busy with my list of chores at home :) He is currently building bunk beds for our boys, and they are going to be amazing! He is working at starting his own business of custom metal work. He has added several things to his truck, including a new tailgate that looks so cool! Danny loves keeping up with the news, politics, and the latest on talk radio. He is in school working hard for his degree and spends the rest of the time hunting with our brother in law Matt, and playing games with the family. 

Trisha has been trying to remain active in her normal activities but the pregnancy has made her slow down a lot and so she is turning to sewing, games, and playing with her boys to keep her sane. Her and Danny are still serving in Nursery and they love the kids they serve, though Trisha is getting more and more uncomfortable as she tries to sit on the ground with them playing, and getting through the entire two hours without feeling sick and crampy is not possible anymore. She is currently sewing comforters for the boys new bunk beds, and then will try her hand at swim shorts for the boys for the upcoming seasons. She reads a lot, and stays very informed with politics and what is happening in the world. She is currently reading a few church books, Sunday lessons, and just finished a compilation of writings from mothers all over. If she doesn't find a new book soon she will probably start all over with some silly fiction she has read a hundred times :)  She loves her friends and family, and is anxiously awaiting the arrival of Dean who is due April 4th, and then she will begin training for our Texas Marathon in December!

Hyrum Patrick is turning 3 in February and shows all the signs of a little boy bursting to make his way in this world. We can't wait until he starts school and can start working that little brain of his that is constantly bursting with energy, thoughts, and ideas. Some of his ideas are not so great, but always inventive. He loves his daddy, horses, Grandpa, juice, trucks, dirt, and his little brother Clynn. His favorite two presents for Christmas were a dragon that roars and walks around, and a train set from "Dinosaur Train" However, the dragon has taught him some bad habits, as he now is constantly roaring which sends Clynn crying to momma every single time! We want him to have fun, but his brother is very sensitive and gets scared easily. We thought Clynn would get used to it, but he cries as much now as he did weeks ago, and it's getting a little old :)  Hyrum also loves his momma's childhood baby doll and likes to carry her around. He is getting good practice for baby Dean. He is a sweet boy, though ALL BOY. His momma loves the cuddles he gives her every day, and the way he follows her around and says HI all day long. He can count to 20 now, sings the ABC song, and is FINALLY potty trained! His energy and love of life is contagious, and when he fastens those big baby blue eyes on someone they melt and fall in love immediately.

Clynn Bryant is turning 2 in May. He is such a boy and yet is also so sensitive. We don't know how the two can go together, but with him, they do. We are constantly wondering who he is, what he did before this life, and who is going to be. He is a reminder to us to be calm, patient, and soft. If anyone yells too loudly in the house he comes running and crying to mom for love. Even if we are just yelling for someone to bring us toilet paper. We can't tell you how many times he has come running to us while on the toilet :) Clynn is very intelligent and talks all day long. He will repeat anything you say, already counts to 10 and loves animals and their noises. We like to sit around coming up with random animals and their noises and he remembers all of them. Him and Hyrum walk around during the day saying silly things and making different noises. He loves wrestling with his brother and can hold his own unless Hyrum gets real loud, then he is done. He loves getting into the dirt outside, and loves rolling balls back and forth across the floor with us. He is momma's cuddle bug, loves bath time, reading time, and any other time that includes momma, or food. We are grateful for his sensitivity, stubbornness, and love for us. 

Baby...  Dean Matthew Wilkins is due April 4th. He is growing quickly with no complications thus far. He is a mover and likes to poke momma in the ribs every time she sits still! He is especially energetic after drinking a soda or eating candy which mom has done more in this pregnancy than the others. She is constantly craving sugars, whether it comes from candy, fruit, ice cream, or soda. With Hyrum it was McDonalds, Clynn was Jack n the Box, and Dean is candy.... Luckily with the others she rarely eats those things after they are born because she is so sick of them. Hopefully she can remove candy and ice cream from her food after Dean is born too. Mom is preparing to have another natural birth with Dean, and is excited for the moment they get to finally meet!

More than anything the Wilkins clan feels gratitude to the wonderful family that surrounds them, their fun and amazing friends, and the spirit of the Lord which they strive to stay close to. We wish all a happy holiday and pray that your family has a wonderful new year. Though we will all pass through trials this year, we hope that you will be close to those that love you and that you will each grow closer to the Savior through each blessing and trial. We love you and feel blessed to be part of your life!

Hi

I am still alive... And will be blogging more often very soon :)

women. bears. food. fun

So I have to blog our latest family camp-out. With all it's ups and downs and in betweens :) What did I learn from this excursion?
1- Camping is just not as fun without my husband.
2- Our camper has a queen sized bed. That is not the same as sleeping with Danny on a California King.
3- There is never too much food, unless Sariah hits Costco beforehand... then there is plenty :)
4- Black bears are pests. hungry. Not scared of people. Look dumb and not interested but can be VERY DANGEROUS!!!
5- I don't like to get dirty.
6- I can get Danny to do almost anything if a massage is used as bait.
7- My husband can do freestyle vertically and underwater.
8- Danny knows how to come out of the water like harry Potter when he uses the gillyweed.
9- My boys are champs when it comes to sleeping in campers!
10- I don't appreciate dogs going to the bathoom in my camper.
11- Nights are cold. night before day break is even colder.
12- You can get through 4 books in 2 nights if you don't get any sleep.
12- Sariah's potatoe soup is just as good as I remember it being.
13- Scones even without yeast are yummy.
14- Sisters love each other...even when we detest each other ;)
15- The party breaks up when every baby is throwing up.......

So... here is the story of the 9 day campout

We showed up Friday night...LATE! because the Wilkins rule is that you have to be HOURS later than planned. We were supposed to be the first ones to arrive so that we could save a spot but, things happened. And instead of leaving at my planned 10-11am we left at Danny's planned 6pm. We got a spot and went to bed. The next day was full of us setting up camp, then taking it all down because it was not right, then others left and we changed again, and then the ranger said two of our campers were in a off limits spot so we moved again... Basically we worked all day. That night we went looking for animals with the spot light. We saw deer, lots of eyes, and the cutest little mouse! When we got home, Tyden and Erin were freaking out because a bear had been in camp and had gone through our food tent and ate some stuff. There was a gash across the entire side of tent, he left a gaping hole and made off with our pop corn! :0 we were all standing around talking about it when McKay yells "BEAR" We turn around and the biggest black bear I ever saw was standing up less than 20 ft. from us licking our grill clean. He just stood there staring at us like what did I do? me and someone else walked towards him yelling. She (turns out) takes off... well, plods off. Less than 10 minutes later another bear a med. size male (her 2 yr. old or something) comes meandering through camp... we run him off. So we spend the next hour putting all our food away and anything else that smells in our vehicles. We even tied a huge garbage bag of diapers etc.... in the tree next to my camper. We then went to sleep... Bear woke us up. We went to sleep. Bear woke us up. We went to sleep. Bear woke us up. Basically, Danny and I tried to sleep but the bear would not leave us alone. They were big pests... The bear was even scratching herself on the bottom of our beds since it overhangs off the sides. Then she was butting her head against the camper and Hyrum yelled "uh oh" apparently he was not asleep like we had supposed. Ugh, I hate not getting sleep. Especially when you get woken up NOT GENTLY, but like you are having a heart attack, panic attack, and getting physically attacked at the same time. It was like the movies... Danny spent 45min. at a time walking around camp scaring them away.

The next day we cleaned up, tried to organize stuff, I got in a fight with a sister :) we ate, and then the boys left us. I was sad. very sad. I missed Danny immediately.

After that, each day was a little better as we got used to the bear. And as the rangers got involved trying to catch them. I heard from someone that black bears are easy to scare and you can just yell at them and they will run away. I thought this was true as every time I ran at them yelling, they ran away. So maybe it is true to a point. It was not until later that I heard that is true, unless they decide to attack, and then they are impossible to stop unless you can kill them. They are ferocious attackers.... I am sorta glad I didn't know that until later. I also learned later of a woman out by us that was attacked by a black bear, she is still in the hospital, barely alive. Three more bears were trapped by camp lemiah where the YW always camp. But I learned something that was important for me to know. I have heard of parents that were frozen in fear as bad things happened to their children. In no way can I judge them, because I know how it feels to be frozen in fear. I have been there. I was there while the bear was bumping against the camper. But the second I heard Hyrum and I heard the bear on that side by him, I was up and out of that camper yelling. I know something for certain about myself. If something or someone tried to cause harm to someone I loved or tried to attack my children I would demolish them! Have you ever seen Indiana Jones with the stones??? If you have, you should recall the ritual that happens underground with the crazy indie people. When they put a sacrifice in the cage and the crazy priest guy pulls out his heart just using his hands. Everyone is chanting.... got that in your head? That would be me. I would pull out the attackers heart! Sorry for the gore. But that is in warning to anyone ever wanting to hurt my family. A better example would be Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality :) lol

We finally caught one of the bears in a trap the rangers set out. It go caught in the middle of the night and we all snuck up on the trap scared to death :) It was so funny. A bunch of us women huddled up creeping up on the trap. Trying to peek a look in the holes to see the bear. Prepared to scream and run if it decided to roar and shake the trap :)

Our husbands pulled up Friday sometime and we played games. Saturday we spent the day at Willow creek lake, cliff jumping and swimming. We had so much fun! The guys were bigger wimps jumping off the cliff than any of the women and kids! Danny finally did it after I bribed him with the best massage of his life. It was hilarious! He landed in the water like his body was karate chopping it. bahahaha! He came straight out of the water like he was doing the freestyle vertically and his body came out past his hips... he shot straight up! :) I love my man. Even if he is scared of water and heights :) I am proud of him for trying. And he went twice! whew! We would have stayed on our camp out longer but we missed our men and all of our babies were sick, and throwing up. It was just a little too much. So home we went, and I was so happy to get in a hot shower and bath... aaaah joy.

Now I am trying to recover from the campout since it gave me a horrid cough and cold. I think it was the lack of sleep for a week. I am working out at the gym, and trying to get back to my routine.

I also learned that I am a routine person. It was really hard for me to be off of my schedule. I have been telling everyone that I can't mess with my boys routine, but the reality is that I love OUR routine, our schedule... and it's hard for all of us to be off of it.

Well that's it for now. Hope you enjoyed the story. be careful, sleep tight, and don't let the bears bite.

Body Image Breakthrough!

Alright, so I gotta write some of my thoughts, feelings, impressions from the workshop that I went to. My friend Aubrey invited me to a "body image" class a few weeks ago. I said yes. I honestly went for 2 reasons: 1 to see my friends that would be there. And 2, to be a good friend by going since I find myself saying no a lot and using the excuse of my kids...

I am so glad that I went. The lady that teaches it is Wendi Jensen and she has a gift for teaching women and getting her message across. It's funny because I know she has helped a lot of women lose weight through her message, but, that is not what I got from it. I really felt that she reminded me of some important truths that I knew but that had been distorted through the years of worldly influence. I feel that I am now on a journey to unify my spirit and body. I am not being selfish anymore with my desires for me and my body. I feel that I can find a true balance now of being a mom, a wife, a sister and daughter... While at the same time doing necessary things to nourish my spirit and my mind, and my body so that I can give more of my "true self" to my loved ones. I have been beating myself up for taking so much time for working out, eating good, etc.... Saying that I was a bad mom and wife. On the flip side, when I would listen to that voice and stop doing things for myself, I would feel unloved, not good enough, lazy, unappreciated, etc... I was really hurting myself, and because of that I would even resent the God given calling of mine as a creator and mother! I felt that I was not good enough for Danny, and I even felt lost and alone throughout the day as I sat at home... I remember sitting there feeling sorry for myself, and really feeling discouraged like there was nothing I could do about it. I can't believe I allowed myself to go down that road. Satan was OBVIOUSLY working in my life.... so sneaky, and cunning he is. Don't get me wrong, I always have some good days, and some good moments here, enough that I didn't completely fall apart, enough that I felt like the bad days were just bad days.... I would just get through them and look for tomorrow. It's amazing how one simple 3 hour class can start the rock to roll down the hill, my soul soaked up everything she taught me! I felt myself improving over the following weeks. I started looking inwards a lot more. I even hosted another class at my sisters house and they loved it! I learned even more, and other words were made clearer to me. THEN I went to Wendi's 9 hour Saturday work-shop. Whew! What a long day! It was emotionally and spiritually exhausting! I loved it! I love how the spirit works when truths are being taught. It was like being in an amazing Relief Society lesson where the whole lesson is on body, spirit, mind, and emotions... But we dove deeper than I had ever been before with these things. I have been apart of very deep doctrine on the Savior, the atonement, the scriptures, afterlife, etc.. but never on my body! It was really cool, and fun as we discussed things as a group and did some group activities. There were some really neat women there that I probably never would have connected with if not for the class. I just feel better. I have a plan now for those down days. I know the right questions to ask myself when I am struggling with something. And I think I will be more apt to recognize when I am subconsciously hurting myself. At least, that is my hope. I know that one of the keys to overcoming Satan's influences is to be more able to recognize him, and see when he is affecting your life. He tries to be so subtle and he uses your greatest weaknesses or passions. So you really have to be in tune with the spirit to know when he is trying to get in. I am glad to have gone to her class. Her message feels right, and I feel empowered! I am in charge of my life! I love my husband and my boys! I am so blessed to be a mother! I am blessed to have these experiences because they teach me, they humble me, and they help me to sympathize with others.
THANK YOU WENDI!!!

Oh yea, and we had to name our body! :) My bodies name is Saphira! pa' q' sepai'

Sorry any of you followers out there...

So sometimes I feel as if my Blog is just like my journal, and my diet. A constant roller coaster ride of starting agains....

So hear I am, starting again. :) I am promising to do a little better for a while. I have so many things going on and I get stuck with scripture study and writing in my boys journals and so I forget to post things happening to ME! One memory I have as a early teen was reading my mom's journal from back when she was a teenager. She only had a few entries but I loved every one of them so much! I remember thinking how I wish she would have written more! I don't know if my "sons" will ever want to read my writings. I wrote all these things for my "future husband" when I was single, and my husband has no interest in reading them! :) So maybe this is all for nothing, but I am going to try and put forth a valiant effort.

Did you know I actually like to write? I enjoy it. I even write poetry here and there.. The problem is that I am not any good. And I would never share it :) So I am stuck posting blogs, to who? who knows! Things have been a little crazy here. I guess I should just give a quick summary of the last few months.

1- Hyrum is still a little rat. The "terrible twos" I guess you would call them, though they started right after he turned 1. He loves to flirt with everyone. He thinks he is the coolest little man alive and struts around with the men as if he is the leader of the pack. He loves horses and is obsessed with them on TV, his toy horses, and of course the real thing! He sits in the saddle as if he has been doing it forever. He loves movies, eating, wrestling his little brother to the ground until he cries, pushing his lil' brother over so that he cries, stealing his lil' brother's bottle so that he cries, sitting on his lil brother until he cries, and finally... making Clynn laugh until he cries. Hyrum has already started my car while I was buckling his brother in and he just turned 2! He can count to 10 by himself, and is learning his ABC's right now. He is amazing at getting into everything he should not get into in a matter of a few minutes. Loves to draw and color. LOVES HIS DADDY! Loves nap time, and his silky/fluffy blanket, and he loves being outside and playing with friends. Did I mention that he loves to eat? and drink? and then eat some more???? He has gorgeous blue eyes that make every girl fall in love immediately! I love him!!!

2- Clynn is walking around furniture etc... He cut his 1st two bottom teeth. He is flippin' adorable. Still loves to snuggle and make his momma laugh. Eats a ton. Loves playing with his big brother. Loves his naps. Finally likes to crawl in the grass. Likes to click his tongue, pull his daddy's arm hair out, and loves cuddling with strange women. I can't believe how many times he has fallen asleep in strange women's arms at our softball games while I coach their daughters :) He wins over any woman that looks at him. Oh yea, and I LOVE HIM!

3- Danny is still working with his brothers and his Uncle Chester. I am glad he has the opportunity to work with family, otherwise he might not see them much. His brother just had a baby boy and we are excited to meet him. He went on a pack trip with his brothers and his dad recently. Boys are not good at conversing but I dragged out of him that the trip was fun, and that the food was amazing! He has an interview at Home Depot tomorrow for two different positions. He is going to school right now, taking online classes this semester and more in class ones next semester.

4- Because Danny is in school we moved! We now live at the "base" at ASU East. We are really liking our new house. It is bigger than our last home and has much more storage which I love!!! All the floors are hard... something??? Which I kind of like since it's easier to clean and better for allergies, but I don't like how Clynn hits his head on it at least once a day. We bought some floor area rugs for it but only for two rooms. We are closer to family and friends now, and to stores, school, etc.... So I am happy. We are saving money, getting rid of debt, and able to get things that we have needed but couldn't before... We like our new ward, and hope to get callings soon so that we can serve.

5- I just found out that my midwife that quit halfway through my second pregnancy is practicing again! She is working at a birthing women's center close by! I can't tell you how happy that makes me! I missed her so much at Clynn's birth. It was just different without her. I thought we had really bonded during Hyrum's birth and felt abandoned with Clynn :) I know that is silly, but I feel so much better about my next pregnancy knowing that she will be around! Yea for Janice Bovee!!!!!

6- I recently attended a Body Breakthrough workshop. It was a 3 hour session and then I signed up for the 9 hour one in a few weeks that really gets into the good stuff. I am so excited about it and will do a whole post on it once it happens. It has changed parts of how I think and see things about myself and I would recommend it to anyone! SO excited!!! My sisters and some friends are doing it too so that will be fun!

7- General Conference is this weekend, I can't wait!!!! I will also do a post on that later....

8- I am working out again. Doing a lot of running, cycling, and weights. Really enjoying it. I play volleyball every wed. night and love the friends I have made there. It is fun to be competitive again, and I look forward to it every week. It's a good way for me to get rid of pent up emotions, and a fun way to burn some calories :) I am preparing myself for a cycling event, a triathlon, and ragnar next year. Then I will be getting pregnant again! Woohooo! Woohooo because I want to have another baby! and Woohooo because I have almost a year before that happens! and Wooohoooo because I am scared to death of having a third! and Wooohooo because maybe I'll have a girl! and Wooohooooo because I KNOW I will have accomplished my physical goals by then and THIS next pregnancy will be like Clynn's. I will not gain more than 15lbs. and I will feel better since I am so into my oils etc... now that have helped me tremendously. and finally, Wooohoooo because I have to remain positive otherwise I might have a huge meltdown!!!

Well I hope you enjoyed my randomness. Love yous!

June 2008
I got married to the handsome cowboy Danny Wilkins
Feb. 2009
I had my first little baby. An energetic little red-head we named Hyrum. He looks like his daddy!
May. 2010
I had my second little boy. Clynn, a sweet dark haired boy that looks like me.
2011 - ? who knows!


Just thought I would give another update on the Wilkins family life. One of my goals is to start blogging more so that I don't have to do long updates. Unfortunately for any of you that like to read long, tedious, blogs... I am just giving a brief summary of what has been going on :)

Danny has a bunch of interviews this month. One this tuesday with a High School teaching ag, and welding. One next Friday with the Arizona beef council, and another later with the Arizona Farm B. he starts school next week full-time at Chandler gilbert for one semester and then he will be transferring to ASU. Because of that we are moving to the family housing at ASU. Many things came to pass to bring about this decision, and though we are sad to leave our first family ward together, we are anxious to do what we know is right and start this new chapter.

Hyrum is doing great. He is almost 2! He runs around the house swinging his arms like he is a speed walker and loves to make us laugh. He has lots of energy and likes to take this out on Clynn. Luckily Clynn is a pretty durable little boy :) Hyrum loves attention, laughing, reading, movies, playing with horses, spending hours outside, and horses!

Clynn is already 8 1/2 months old. I can't believe it! He went from a newborn to a 3 month old over night. He is so big and long, and will soon be the same size as Hyrum. Clynn is a sweetheart. He loves to cuddle, get kisses, smile, and EAT! He is the most smiley baby I have ever seen. And he eats more than Hyrum ever did though he is more patient with me than Hyrum was while waiting for his food to be ready. Clynn loves to play with anything that makes music and he loves to listen to me sing. He is a little angel.... most of the time!

I am doing good. Right now I am doing a 60 Day Challenge with a bunch of other women. So far I have not broken any of the rules of the challenge, though I have had a few hard moments like when my in-laws gave Danny and I a huge basket with a movie, popcorn and all my favorite boxes of candy! I have been busy taking care of my babies, my home, and danny. I have been packing things up for the move, and trying to keep the house clean. hard work! I work out every day. Either by doing weights, spin class, running, or work-out videos at home. I have big goals for myself and though I have not lost any weight in the last month I am bettering my life and health and hope it will start coming off eventually.

We are happy.

Wilkins Update

We are recovered! Took a little longer than 8 wks. for me to start feeling in the groove, but we are finally arriving! Here is a quick update on the family.

Danny is still out of work but has been able to continually get side jobs that have gotten us through these hard times. He has applied at dozens of jobs and has interviewed at many as well. He has a couple of good prospects in the workings right now and hopefully one of them works out. He is planning on school this next semester. It is going to be a busy year for us and one of great sacrifices. Him and I are on the Dave Ramsey wagon... we are not spending money and are trying to get our finances in gear so that we can pay off all debts and start a good savings. This year of no work has taught us some tough lessons. But ones that I am grateful to have learned. He works with a guy in the ward, and with his brothers, as well as some personal contracts he has gotten for this and that. Danny is such a good man. It is hard applying via the internet because people are not able to meet him in person. But I know eventually someone will take that chance.
I have been being mom and wife and sister and friend.... that is my job right now :) However, this week that has slowly been added upon. I have had mtgs. this week and I start coaching again on Monday. I am back at Queen Creek High this year. I know said I was done but I couldn't stay away :) Luckily, I was able to go back as an assistant this year with my good friend Heather S. taking on the role of Head coach. This way I can be a mommy and coach with less responsibilities. I am grateful to be back. I love coaching, and love the kids we work with. I am still looking into teaching. I do not have my bachelors yet but a school here in Queen Creek is looking into hiring me. I hope it works out, they have some ideas on how to accelerate my teaching degree. I have started to work out again. For now I am trying to get back into the swing of things with spin class, and the treadmill with some weights thrown in there... I also do P90X but I can't really claim to do it... I try to do it. I used to do it... now I just try to survive it :) Things have been crazy with the family. My parents are moving out into an apartment. Erin is getting ready to have her baby soon. Howard has about 20 months left in prison. Max and Cindy just left back to Texas after a week of visiting us. Sariah and Matt adopted and were sealed to Savana and now have a new little foster daughter whom they are working on adopting as well. Jill and Wade are doing good, just working and playing.

Hyrum, is my little monster. I love him so much! He is into everything. And when I say everything I mean everything. He is like Stitch from Lilo and Stitch. He comes into a room surveying it for possible destruction possibilities. He goes for all the toys first and then he immediately goes for things that are beyond his reach. He climbs up chairs, sofas, entertainment centers, anything that he can climb... He loves mommy's phone, our drinks, the computer, pretty much he feels the need to touch everything that exists! :) We never waiver from our mission to stop this behavior. We are very consistent, but so is he. hahahaha. He is a ham as well. I love his laughter, his yells, his tongan looking chant he does, his silliness. He is very handsome as well and has the cheesiest grin. I love his strawberry blonde hair, his gorgeous big blue eyes and big lips. He looks just like his daddy! He loves to make funny sounds and to mimic me. He is saying some new words: diaper, shoe, buba, doggy, thank you, please, towel, etc... He loves his little
brother and likes to kiss him, lay on him, steal his pacifier, and loves to make him smile.

Clynn is a wonder to me. I just love this little angel so much. He loves to smile, coo, and LAUGH OUT LOUD!!! Hyrum would smile and coo but never really LAUGHED. Clynn looks a lot like I did as a child and when he laughs it's just like my baby pictures. His whole face crinkles up like mine did and he belly laughs. He can't even breathe good sometimes, he is laughing so hard. And he is only 3 months old. I love it, and am constantly tickling him and smiling at him to get this wonderful reaction. He is also a cuddler unlike his brother was. He loves to lay around with me, and the closer he is to me the happier he is. He has dark hair but in the sun it has a hint of red to it. His skin is more olive toned like mine and he has mommy's nose. Sorry kid. I love how different my boys are. They have their own personalities and I love them both so much.

All in all our family is doing great and we are happy and content in life. We have many things to be thankful for. We have had our trials this year, and are going through some things now with family but we love our family, and love to be with them. The Lord has provided for us when we didn't know if we would make it or not. I love my children and love my kids. What more could I ask for? oh yea... an eternity of this

Clynn

And in the Right Corner
at 20 inches and weighing in at 8 pounds, arriving with us at 3:33 on May 1st,
Introducing our newest lightweight champion of the year...
Clynn Bryant Wilkins!!!

This was a very special moment for me. I am so glad the hospital had just lifted their restrictions, and Hyrum was allowed to come see us. My two little warriors!

I received so much help by Heavenly Father in getting this sweet little boy into my arms.
I am so grateful for those that supported me (literally) through the long haul!
I have a wonderful husband and mother that were HUGE pillars of strength for me.
And Tracie was a gift from Heavenly Father whom knew I would need the extra support to
get through this one.

My Story...
Danny and I went in to my Dr. App. to do a stress test and ultra sound. My doctor whom is there as a back-up to my midwife said the placenta looked old and that the uterus did not have much fluid around the baby. He ordered us to the hospital for an induction. I had received inspiration already in bringing Danny with me to the app. since he never goes with me except for the 1st ultrasound.

We got our stuff, went to the hospital to start a series of 4 gel inserts which induced labor and got my body ready to have Clynn. After 12.5 painful hours I had only dilated to a 5 which I got stuck at for 4 hours and then my labor completely dwindled to a contraction here and there! It was very frustrating emotionally! I was tired, especially after being sick all week and not sleeping well with that and the pregnancy.

Danny and I went into the bathroom and talked, and I cried, and we prayed. We decided to wait an hour without doing anything so that I could rest, and we could better determine our next step. The doctor wanted to break my water and give me pitocin. I knew that would lead down a path that might change my birthing plan. I also was wanting an epidural because I was so emotionally down and obviously because... BIRTHING A BABY HURTS! :]

After an hour I was feeling better, then in walked JO the new nurse. Who by the way is the bomb! I was still contemplating getting an epidural. In my mind it was impossible to do natural birth with pit. I also thought the contractions would come on HARD right from the beginning and I was a little scared :) why? because BIRTHING A BABY HURTS! :] Well Jo overheard us and said, Trisha. You can do it. I did! It boosted me and I was determined again. They started it low and upped it every half hour. Contractions came, they got worse, I got more cranky and focused in my zone :)

They checked me 8 hours later and I was still at a 6-7. Midwife was on her way to break my bag of waters, and I was so mad! I was hurting and wanted Clynn out! I couldn't imagine going 8 more hours! I prayed. Sitting on the toilet :) I felt the need to start pushing, and I did though everyone kept saying DON'T! I ignored them. My water broke! woohoo! And I felt all the same feelings physically that I had with Hyrum and I knew it was time. I started bearing down, out of MY control now. The midwife showed up and Tracie was like "you can't have your baby on the toilet, let's move!" :) I bore down once more there, made it to the bathroom door and did it again, made it to the bed...again, made it on the bed, and then OUT came CLYNN!
It hurt, It was amazing, It hurt some more, and it was a miracle!

The best part of it was the bond that was formed between me and those involved as we were all apart of the miracle, and they witnessed the spirit of God's work in action. I loved my mom, and husband and Tracie before... but we have a special bond now. And it only gets stronger with Danny and I through each new baby.

Our Lord knows all, and the prayers said to him during those 20 hours from me were answered, and I received the help I needed when I needed it most.


Sweet little boy! He looks a lot like his brother! But his face has it's own uniqueness and he was born with more color to his skin, and with brunette hair.
So, no more red heads for us right now....

My little guy was tuckered out after his first bath!

Like Father... Like son!